Saturday, February 11, 2012

A Valentine's Day To Remember


In this month of love I asked Red Handed to help me out with a post sprinkled with the splashes of love from her perspective. She said okay. I said good. She poured some neat ideas, I blend them with dirt. And before we could claim the superiority we co-authored a blog post. Tada!
Valentine’s Day is just a few days away and I am all excited about it. Perhaps, Valentine’s Day serves me much more than Diwali. We all know the fabricated custom of this day. Sending SMSes to only girls. Oozing your tender feelings for her; of course on SMS or sometimes on GTalk. Fixing a plan to meet for face-to-face confession with some chocolates and flowers. This is Valentine’s Day in Indian sphere unlike western. Things have gone social. Couples spamming your News Feed on Facebook, Timeline on Twitter, Scrapbook on Orkut and Nothing on LinkedIn with their heart melting I Love You Jaanu posts beautifully carved with and tones of emoticons “<3”; being prominent. If you do NOT use “<3” at the end of every wall post you write on your partner's wall on Facebook, you are not in love. Period. End of discussion. I personally relish such posts, much because I love to barge in with irksome comments and leave with a sense of doubt. The best thing about today's socially advanced custom you are considered a couple only when your Facebook status is updated from being single to in a relationship.

A lot of people talk about what to do after you are in a relationship but never cared to mull what preparations are prerequisite for it. How would you feel if the moment of desperation ends up blowing in your face? You propose her with some perfectly rehearsed lines; a convincing brief of your inclination for her and all you get at the end is a tossed heart straight into the dustbin which reads “use me”. This is a scenario of unprepared Ranjha. Heer would never suffer such loss of determination because she would never approach her wanted-to-be Ranjha; moral girl code strictly prohibits them for certain acts; Sistah Code (Sly copy of Bro Code).


Sometimes, reality bites


I don’t know what makes this day so special. If a boy proposes a girl he loves on Valentine’s Day, he has as much chances of getting his heart crushed and ass kicked as on any other day of the year. I believe that unless you are 100% sure that the chick you love is bound to say yes to you, do not propose her on Valentine’s day, for then you will remember the day as a day of perpetual heartbreaks. People see 14th Feb as an epitome of victory of love over the world; a world which has an indefinite proportion of divorce rates over marriage rate. And somehow when I think of it this way, it makes me giggle. Stereotypes are born but there is no Russells Peters to crush them.

If I look at Valentine’s Day from a better human perspective, it is a day where virgin (let us just say, just.) committed guys can take yet another shot at trying to make their lover to do some hanky panky things. It is a day when girls get a bit more liberal about the whole concept of being touched and thus making them boys successful in achieving their prurient interest. The young India talent exactly knows what I am talking about. See. SEE. You are winking now. Their tender brain cells are already on a constructive work of forming a virtual scenario on how to pursue. Leaving the discussion behind, let us concentrate on much more delicate issue lying beside us untouched, no offence.

14th Feb is a day when newspaper turns into India TV. The moment you open the newspaper, it is filled with love quotes and a whole page filled with messages from MAJNOOS to their respective LAILAAS and vice versa. It is a day when an elder brother cannot take his sister to the local park or the marine drive, in scare of the Bajrang Dal activists beating him down to pulp. A brother and a sister were beaten by party members of Bajrang Dal in Ujjain because apparently they were found the duo “together” when the brother was dropping her sister to her college and “somehow” the party members mistook them for a couple and themselves decided to “teach the couple a lesson”, of course by publically beating the boy and insulting the girl. Brother-sister of same age cannot coexist. Bajrang Dal does not approve such kind of family planning. 



To be blunt, intruding the personal lives is not what Indian cult taught us. Influence of west is undeniable but calling the essence of love against Indian culture is a fact that hard to chew, especially when Indian cultural devotees’ or Bajrang Dal-ites tender minds tend to forget the binding of the book "Kamasutra” was happened in Indian.

41 comments:

  1. Hahahaha how awesome this is!! I am link it up or might end up posting this. Awesome !

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  2. hahahhaha...that was hilarious! :)

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  3. Stereotypes are for stand up comedians to crush...true.

    the day is over hyped. For those who are in love its valentines day everyday....and for those who dont have a partner; it is a cruel reminder.

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    1. Come to think of it, Bajrang Dal search for their prey only on Valentine's Day. How awesome this is.

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  4. lol..I like how u think infact *hi5* coz our thots are much d same, am bit more on the extreme side actually.
    Needless to say , v-day/week is a pure marketing gimmick and some morons do not (CAN never) understand it.

    sarah

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    1. It is also "Buy costly Archies Card Day".

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  5. lol..I like how u think infact *hi5* coz our thots are much d same, am bit more on the extreme side actually.
    Needless to say , v-day/week is a pure marketing gimmick and some morons do not (CAN never) understand it.

    sarah

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  6. "14th Feb is a day when newspaper turns into India TV." hahahaha.
    And about the Bajrang dal and other similar dals, hope this carton(https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/181774_168931906487204_100001111863925_360799_3606340_n.jpg) is worth a thousand words. :)

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    1. Haha! Cartoon shows the Freedom of Expression could also be sometimes be read in a more flamboyant manner.

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  7. Replies
    1. Reality has its own funny side; I think so.

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  8. Balle balle post .. wah ji wah made me laugh and smile thank you

    Bikram's

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  9. haha, even a father cannot take his daughter out for shopping on this day

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    1. Father-daughter is not as big deal as brother-sister. Same age makes their blood relation almost in-distinguishable.

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  10. Red Handed and you together, AMAZING :)
    I accompanied my friend to a card shop yesterday, and there was no place to stand! it was jam packed! Every restaurant, every cafe had heart balloons all around. How I wished that I could enter and burst all the balloons :P
    I don't see why this day needs to be so hyped up! :)
    Loved the post :) Was a funny and light read!

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    1. Thank you Phil0. Celebrating and all is fine but the perpetual overrate perplex me. Mother's/Father's/Children's Day shares only the quarter celebration as 14th Feb does. Kind of partial, aren't we?

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  11. I just couldn't stop laughing reading this post.Fabulous work :D
    The concept of being touched...rofl :)
    With this you earn a new follower!I'm way too irregular blogger though. :)

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    1. Those lines are not mine but Red would have said Thank you. :)

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  12. This is hilarious stuff Prateek. And agree with you on most accounts. Everything is commercialized.

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    1. Anything that can account some hard cash is a subject of commercial scrutiny.

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  13. lol...nice post....Hallmark, Archie's and the florists are going to hate you as much as those Bajrang dals...

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    1. Pros and cons sir. This is life we live.

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  14. That was a nice take on Valentine's day.

    and errr..I didn't propose anyone and didn't get any proposal from anyone. Sad! :( Didn't even do the touching and not touching thing because I had exams to write. :(

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    1. Haha! Better if it does not happen than to push it to happen.

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  15. Looks like I have been much, much late in commenting here. But then, I was busy celebrating being single? I think that it is the only day when committed people can celebrate with a distinct purpose in mind. For us, it was just like any other day, celebration :D

    Nice read BTW, umm which part belongs to you and which one is by Red Handed? :P

    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

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    1. Haha! Anshul playing dirty. Sharp lines were Red's ridicule, I merely painted them.

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  16. V day is freedom day and even few people marry the donkey to boys on V day.

    nice pic

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  17. I LOVE the Russel Peters reference. Hilarious. And the post. Sigh. Truth bites.

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  18. Valentine's day. What a load of fun cr*p. The only true image I can conjure up is the shopkeeper stroking his galla and whispering "Happy Valentine's Day, baby" As for the right wing politicoes, lighten up. Hope you never succeed in taking away the sense of fun from our young.

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  19. ha ha that had me laughing for a long time :P
    visiting after a really long time..
    hope u doing fine.

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